#Meaning-Making-Machines. What keeps us in ineffective jobs, careers, relationships that makes us inert; unable to make chg
I am always amazed by people’s reactions when they are let go or laid off from a company. Quite often the person has a sense of entitlement due to longevity at the company which presents itself in an angry response. The meaning that is attached to the event often has little to do with the actual event.
I have heard people say things like:
“Oh, I have been here 3 years and they are letting me go and keeping you, and you have only been here 5 months!”
“Yeah, well good luck to you here working here!”
“Why are you letting me go? So and So doesn’t do any work, and you’re letting me go?!”
On Accountant said, “Well, I knew things were bad, but not this bad!” (and he took care of the finances. uh, duh.)
Personally, I was laid off from a computer parts manufacturer from inside the technical writing department. I was completely in shock when it happened, but admittedly, I knew in my core, deep down in my soul that it had been time to move on for a while. My intuition had been nagging me for months and I had ignored it until that moment presented itself. Feelings experienced after being laid off range from shock, fear, anger, anxiety and depression.
What is it that keeps us in jobs, careers or relationships that makes us inert; unable to make a change?
We all have comfort factors and build protective cushions around ourselves. We may even create our own reality about events that is far from the truth. Finally, we have a tendency to attach meaning and stories to everything that touches our lives. Some would even go so far as to say we are “meaning-making-machines,” and we attach meaning to everything that happens in and around us. Typically the meaning we attach has to do with the tape made by our”subconscious mind recorder” at some earlier time in our lives. Every time something happens our subconscious mind finds the matching tape and automatically plays it — whereupon we react once again to it! We have incredible minds and our mind does an amazing job of “protecting” us by recycling old tapes over and over again in an attempt to protect us.
As thinking people, we have a choice — we can allow our mind to continue its reactionary responses (which may or may not serve us) or we can make a different choice NOW. When the subconscious response is triggered we can choose to allow the reaction or respond differently. We have a new opportunity to change our frame, to change our programming. Our responses have been with us forever, does that make them accurate? Does a longevity mean it serves us and is is viable today? That is the big question we get to ask ourselves:
“How is this response pattern working for me today?” “Is it serving me?” “Am I in congruence with this response?” “Is this a response I want to have?
We become very comfortable, perhaps even complacent in our lives and actions. Often we just stay put and don’t move into action
Today is a good day to assess and reassess your reactions not only to a stressor like being laid off, but to the ordinary stimuli, life and relationships in our daily lives. When you find response patterns that are not serving you move into action to change things to improve your lives.
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Rhonda Robbins, Success Strategies Coach, NLP Practitioner, Personality Trainer and Certified Life Coach is always available for one-on-one business or personal coaching sessions in person, on the phone, via Skype, Google Talk, Google Voice or Yahoo Video Call. You can email her at firstname.lastname@example.org or call/text to 480-343-8700.
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